This blogging thing makes me a better grown up. I learn lessons without someone having to sit down and school me in how I’m wrong – I learn via watching and the light bulb A-HA moment.

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I had a light bulb moment about friendship and favors about a year ago.

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Back when I started blogging (way back in ought seven) I met Mrs Flinger. She was all cool and together (snort) and awesome. She had a great looking site, lots of experience, and a shiny new job with a web design company.

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I thought, “Ooooo, she’s my buddy, I bet she’d cut me a deal on a great looking site for ME!!!!”

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I never did ask her about it – probably saw something bright and shin….oooo butterfly ….

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ahem.

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Then we were talking about life, and money (the lack of), the money troubles in the Flinger house condo, the pressure of deadlines and people asking for work for free – when she needed paying jobs to keep the family in the black less in the red.

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Ugh. A rock sat in my stomach. The light bulb turned on – and the lamp smacked me upside the head. I’d totally missed the point of friendship in looking out for a deal for myself.

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I wish I would have always thought, “Ooooo, she’s my buddy, I’d love to support her and pay her to build a great looking site for ME!!!!”

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I learned. I got the point. I’m learning to apply that point in my life. I’m learning to support my friends rather than looking for a handout from my friends.

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The hardest person to raise is myself. *shakes head*

(I have a lot of deep thoughts while I’m not sleeping. Big, important, deep thoughts. I don’t know how to share them all yet, but I’m going to try to pare things down to small bits that I can manage.)

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1. Walking. Almost 40 million hits on the goog about Benefits of Walking.

2. Laughing. Just reading the facebook status updates of people makes me all tense and clutchy and stroke feeling. Laughter sets that feeling free and replaces it with a lighter feeling.

3. A clean kitchen. This is my goal for today. A clean kitchen. I will use my kitchen sink as a home base to start and just keep going.

4. Sharing what I have. I gave my birthday money to Anissa. Told her not to spend it all on hookers and blow.

5. Brushing my teeth. Cuz for serious. Wow. Needs to be done – I’m off to do it right now.

xoxoxo

When Scout got home from work yesterday, I congratulated him on making us so boring financially that ABC World News didn’t want to put me on the National News.

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To say he was confused would understate his reaction.

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Heather had called me to see if I would be up for an interview about being middle class – after talking to the lovely woman from ABC World News with Diane Sawyer, lovely woman said we weren’t what she was looking for for the story – before getting off the phone, I gave a shout out on Skype “hey, any of y’all middle class and squeezed?” and Angie was all “UM YEAH!” – so I passed her number to the woman and Angie was on the national news talking about financial struggles in the middle class.

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Angie has a small online store – Good for the Kids – which specializes in finding educational items and toys that are … good for the kids. I’ve posted about doing all my Christmas shopping in one place before. I still have a pretty well stocked present closet from my shopping trips there. I feel good about what I buy from Angie, and I feel even better that I’ve helped a person I have a relationship with, and not just a big box store. From the comments on the post, others are feeling that too.

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(*yes I know that people work in big box stores too, but those people didn’t hold my hand while I wrote a post the night my dad died – Angie did* (pwd protected, just ask for the pwd – you aren’t the reason it’s protected.))

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While Scout and I may be comfy, unsqueezed middle class, I do like to pay attention to where our money goes. I don’t buy things for the sake of buying things. (I really liked the Team Anissa tshirts – but I realized don’t wear crew neck tshirts, for example.)

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There are less dollars to go around – so I figure I better make damn sure that where I’m giving my dollars is what and who I want to support. Slowly but surely I am figuring out how I can get the things I like (oh that I really, really like) and know that my dollars are directly helping people I have a relationship with.

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I may not have a local main street in my town where I can walk and browse and talk to shopkeepers who are my friends, but I have bookmarks all through my browser of a virtual main street where I can wander and get things I like from people I love. (And even help out the USPS a lot of the time!)

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Oh yes, that list with a fancy button are coming!