I named this three times before deciding “preparing” was right. I started with “Growing” then “Waiting”.
I am preparing.
I am preparing my home. I am making this home mine. Alex gets a little say, but really, this is my space and I’m so thrilled with the chance to create my own space.
I am letting go of what I don’t need. Which will result in you seeing some photos of hilarious outfits I’m trying to put together and then deciding oh screw this, who wants a free dress.
I am learning that trying to control people doesn’t make me happy (Thanks Julie the shrink for that insight – when she pointed out how happy I was and then asked who I was controlling and the answer was no one)
I’m getting projects done. Want some alpaca fleece? There’s more coming soon.
I go back to a day job next month – for the first time since Alex was born.
I have plan for the blogs. There will be three. Plans. I haz them.
I am preparing myself to be a worthy partner to the person I love. Knowing the future day is out there when I will have to be strong enough to stand for what I need, soft enough to listen and let him be who he is becoming.
I am a better mom. I can tell it in Alex’s speech, in his love, in his hugs. We love each other better now.
I am preparing. And I love it.
*written whilst on Vicodin and on the one year anniversary of the demise of my marriage. just so ya know where my head is*
(((hugs))) Preparing is an important step to doing.
Sounds like good progress. We heart Julie.
your preparations sound perfect. Prepare for what’s coming, do what you need to, accept the results and then move on to what’s next. A canvas can be turned into whatever you want it to be, no matter what was previously painted on it.
This. Is. Awesome.
Be good to yourself.
I’ve finally caught up on a bunch of your stuff I missed and I have to tell ya – I feel like we’re going through similar things. I’ve recently been learning to let go of control and thought I was doing so well…then I realized…expecting someone to react in a certain way to what *I* do is a form of control, too. So I’m not quite back at square one, but also learning that the learning never stops. (dur.)
[...] is up to me to prepare for the future. To know myself, love myself, trust myself to be in a relationship and not lose myself in it. I [...]