We went to the ped last week, and on the 4 month information they gave us was this line:
“Many babies sleep through the night by this time.”
Oh. My. Gaw.
Now, I really should have asked for definition of terms of the word “many” and the phrase “sleep through the night” because what those words translated as in my exhausted “oh. my. gaw. I’m never getting a full night of sleep again” brain is:
“Every baby but YOURS is sleeping 12 hours at a stretch by this time, so if you are so fucking tired you could fucking die, it’s your own fucking fault.” (When I get tired, my adjectives decrease to only my favorite one.)
I need advice. I need to hear from every single person who has a baby who did/does any of the following:
Screams when he’s snuggled down to nap – at the FIRST possible sign of being tired (negating the over tired argument – I did read my Pantley).
Does NOT scream when Daddy walks him around the house to go to sleep – either at night or during the day.
Does NOT scream when I put him in the wrap and walk him around the house to go to sleep during the day.
Apparently sleeps with one eye open like a cat, because as soon as I try to shift him out of wrap – fuhgeddaboudit, he’s awake, nap is ruined, screaming commences, and we’re farther and farther away from getting those 15 hours of needed sleep a day.
Will. Not. Sleep. at night. for long. for the last three weeks. Wakes, kicks, if not fed will commence that I’m asleep but I’m still going to cry and keep everyone awake cry.
Will. Not. Allow me to give him the bottle for a few minutes till he is CLEARLY not drinking, and then take it away – see above.
If your baby has/had any of these issues, please tell me that I will not die from this. That someday he will sleep a decent chunk of time. That I’m not a freaking failure as a parent because My. Baby. Will. Not. Sleep.
I’m so tired, I don’t even want advice, just tell me someday it will be okay.
This shitty, fucking, pain in the ass time will pass. It will so pass that someday you’ll be one of those assholes who says, “oh I miss those days when they were so small and easy to care for.”
It will pass. You will someday be out of this sleep deprivation torture chamber called your own life.
It will. You will make it. You deserve to drop a lot of swear words – as many as you need to.
Someday you’ll sleep blissfully all night long. Someday you’ll wake up rested. Someday he will too.
You’ll be okay. You really will.
It will pass. It’s strange, usually the first born is the angel baby so that they fool you into having more.
The first one, she slept through the night by 8 weeks. I remember being all smug as shit when people were surprised at that. Boy, someone cursed me for sure.
Then, the Evil one came.
I couldn’t sign Glen up fast enough for a vasectomy.
I think she was about a year when she finally slept through the night.
Earplugs helped. Cause she will STILL wake in the night, “talk” a bit and go back to sleep.
Unfortunately, my plan to never CIO with any of my kids died a horrible death, when we determined that the ONLY place the Evil one would sleep was attached to me. That was NOT going to happen. There was no middle ground with her, it was “attached to mommy” or full bear screaming.
We determined that she simply was not getting enough sleep, and that the screaming was a result of that. The Ped suggested moving her bedtime back an hour, which we did, and she started going down easier. Once we also bought a noise machine, that helps drown out the sounds of her eldest sister running a circus next door.
bringing over from alexyearone:
Mary Alice (http://www.fromthefrontlines.blogspot.com/)
September 4th, 2007 at 10:54 pm ?Ç¬? Edit
It will pass. My oldest child (now 17) was just like your baby. He woke up to everything. Wouldn?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢t sleep unless he was ON me. Screamed everytime anyone put him down. Screamed non-stop in the car seat. I understand that kind of bone tiredness?¢‚Ç¨¬¶but I swear it will pass. He will sleep the night some time. It may not be soon. But it will happen.
The Other Dawn
It will pass. I think. I am not sleeping throught the night yet. But I have to believe it will pass. Or I would walk in front of a bus (totally not on purpose, probably just sleep walking).
My son did this same thing– we ended up sleeping with him on our chest in a recliner. Once he got older, we just gave up and co-slept. We just needed to get some effing sleep, and we didn’t care how we got it, short of drugging the baby. You’ll figure it out. Or he’ll get over it.
Brought over from other site:
Mrs Flipphead denofwolves.wordpress.com
Mine would fight and fight and fight, not to go to sleep. He (don?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢t get depressed by this) didn?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢t sleep through the night until he was 16 months old.
At 18 months old, he will take one nap during the day now. But I don?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢t dare drive anywhere with him, closer than two hours before his nap because if he falls asleep in the car (even for 5 minutes), he wakes up as soon as the car stops and will NOT take a nap after that. I hate that gas is so high or I might be tempted to just drive around for two hours.
I cry when I hear about people forgetting their babies in their car seats and then the babies die. I know how that happens?¢‚Ç¨‚Äúsleep deprivation.
I took my (then three year old) to preschool one day when my younger son was four months and still waking every 1 1/2 hours to nurse for 40 minutes. I was putting my three year old?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢s back pack in his cubby when he asked me if I was going to work. I told him I was going home until it was time for me to pick him up. This was out of my ordinary routine (my mom who usually watched the baby while I worked and my oldest was at preschool was sick that day). As I was telling him this and I remembered the reason I wasn?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢t going to work, it slowly dawned on me that I had left my sleeping infant alone in the car. I just?¢‚Ç¨¬¶left him. Momentarily forgot I had a baby.
Fortunately, I was in the building less than 10 minutes, it was a cool spring day. I had locked the car and he was still sleeping when I came out (complete miracle that he was still sleeping).
I ALWAYS keep the diaper bag, back pack, what have you in the front seat with me as a reminder now. And every time I hear about a baby who died because someone deviated from their routine and forgot to drop the baby off at daycare?¢‚Ç¨¬¶a chill goes up my spine.
You will survive this. Your baby will survive this. You can do this. I can tell by your writing that you are a strong woman. With practice, you will learn to sleep sitting up, holding your baby.
The mind is a beautiful thing. You won?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢t go crazy. Your brain adapts and it will engage in dreaming and REM sleep while sitting up and within minutes of you falling asleep, rather than the normal 90.
If you need a shoulder, or reassurance that you are not losing your mind, and the crazy things that run through your mind because you are so tired, are normal?¢‚Ç¨‚Äúdrop me an email: email@example.com.