I occasionally miss my former job. Like days when the Kaiser is still in the process of going down for his second nap of the day when it. is. time. for. bed. oh. mah. gaw.
So, now for something completely different.
A story from the vault of my teaching days. (Written in present tense, but it happened last year.)
I wonder why kids think I’m stupid.
Tuesday I had my kids in the computer lab I’d been busy up at the front for most of class but finally had a chance to walk around.
I was standing on the back row when the lone boy in my class, let’s call him Pee-Wee shall we, notices I’m standing near him and he minimizes the internet screen he had up.
Especially since as the screen was minimizing I was pretty sure my powers of literacy caught the word “female” in a title.
So I walk over. “Pee Wee, buddy, that’s makes you look really guilty when you blank out your screen as soon as you notice I’m standing behind you.”
Non interesting response.
“So you have two choices. You can pull the page back up and show me what you were looking at or you can press Command Q and quit Safari and make a better choice.”
“Where’s the command button?”
So after school my powers of computer hacking allowed me to access his account, his internet browser and his history.
When the 9th item out of the 10 most recently viewed sites was “Boobs – Google Image Search” I almost died laughing.
And then went off to find Pee Wee’s case manager. Told the story to her and my dept chair and another few teachers. Then the Case manager and I headed to the media center to chat w/ them.
Which resulted in him losing his internet access for the rest of his high school career. Ended up in ISS for a few hours yesterday.
I never thought I would actually be in a situation where I have to ponder. Hm. Should I do a lesson on why it’s a BAD idea to look up p0rn at school?
The other day, my 10yo and I were looking for an image for his Star Wars report. On page 13 of Google, there were two women carpet munching. I saw it a little late. Son exclaimed, “Now that’s just wrong!” I say give him a few years.
Cricket’s last blog post..Sexual favors
They are just so na?É¬Øve. The curiosity, so strong – and then the impression that no one would ever find out, that they couldn?¢‚Ç¨‚Ñ¢t look into their browsing history. Too funny. These are the hard lessons of life.
Mary Alice’s last blog post..“Yeah? Well, I called shotgun!”
Oh that is good! You’d think he’d have internet access at home…why would he bother at school?!?!
Random Ramblings’s last blog post..Prepare Yourselves
crazy from across the desk
hee hee. what slays me is that, while smart enough to figure out how to get around the whole banned from internet thing, he was not savvy enough to realize that he would get caught, again, in the same school year. can you spell d-u-h? Pee Wee is doing fine this year, btw. 🙂
“Boobs”. Boys! One night at a bookstore, we were walking down the medical aisle and these two, probably 12 year old boys, dropped a book and ran. I picked it up and it was open to the female anatomy page, but not even the detailed stuff. Heh. Amateurs. Don’t they know there is a whole SEX section in the bookstore? We had a nice chuckle about that one.
Kyla’s last blog post..Wordless Wednesday: Things KayTar won’t drink
I’ve caught my husband doing the same Google search…
Victoria’s last blog post..Our Christmas Trip to NY. Late, but Still Good.
When we first got the internet, I heard Ass Burger Boy shriek at a page he found. He was googling naughty words like “pee” and saw an image of a golden shower. Since then, of course, I stay the heck away from his computer. I do not want to know.
witchypoo’s last blog post..I?m a Movie Star!
that kind of stuff is just normal dinner table conversation at my house. sigh.
child protective services should be there in the morning.
janet’s last blog post..Absence makes the heart grow weepy
Pee Wee’s mom would kick his ass if he did it at school..must of thought it was a good idea to just do it when she wasn’t there 🙂
MP’s last blog post..MY Europe AND MY World
I’m so glad I worked with preschoolers.
Jennifer’s last blog post..Lip Schmackahs
This sounds eerily familiar, except that PeeWee was my husband and we were at home. 😛
Ewokmama’s last blog post..Not so good books
Kids are not smart all the time, for sure. But… you know… who can resist the lure of BOOBS, dude? Not I.
Sarcastic Mom’s last blog post..Just for a moment.
Kelli @ Gohn Crazy
*L* Boobs? I don’t know if I could take that seriously. I mean couldn’t he come up with anything better than boobs? Creativity countswhen Googling. Yeah he deserved to get turned in (haha I typed “on” instead of “in”).
Kelli @ Gohn Crazy’s last blog post..Tagged!
Aw, poor kid. Let him see some boobies, he may never get another chance.
Marie’s last blog post..How to Make an Uncrustable
Last summer I was doing the crafts for Vacation Bible School, and using cigar boxes. My friend and I were getting stuff organized when we noticed a box that had a image on the lid inside — a woman with one exposed breast. We immediately did a porn search of the rest of the boxes, and found one more nipple.
I was very glad I discovered the boobs before I gave the boxes to the kids…
Julie’s last blog post..Random Photos Day…
Oh that is a thing of beauty
Flutter’s last blog post..In commiseration
The boys at my school used to google for Trish Stratus (If you don’t know who she is, then thank your lucky stars) because all her photos would show tiny bikinis. Not quite enough to get them kicked off the internet, but enough to make the boys go ‘Woooo!’
Veronica’s last blog post..More Random Mindless Drivel With Me Shouting SQUEEEEEE! In The Middle.
Some people at work still look at porn, and I wonder if they could have used a teacher like you who told them what “appropriate” venues there are for certain activities. I mean, I only look at porn at home. In the dark. Naked. Like normal people. Right? 🙂
Great post. Sounds like me at work (not the p0rn part) but the part about clicking the screen off when you walked up behind him. I always surfed at work and I’m quite sure I’ve been caught clicking the close button a few times, hearing someone approach my desk too late.
Huckdoll’s last blog post..I Was Only Six Numbers Away From Winning The Lottery
The Mentor Mom
Why am I not surprised to hear that man’s obsession with boobs starts so early? It has already begun with my son who is nine. He can’t watch a girl jiggling in a swimsuit without turning red and giggling. Sigh. Not looking forward to the teen years…
PS: Congrats on increasing the number of homo sapiens in your household and successfully achieving your well written goal 😉
Why is it that men or fledgling men are obsessed with these?
They are essentially growths of fat and glands. *Sigh* I will never understand the male population…
Tiffany’s last blog post..Escape with me.
When I tried to read the comments on this post from school, the filter blocked it. 🙂
LSM’s last blog post..A Twilight Zone Moment
oh, that is enough to make me miss teaching for just a wee little bit! Thanks for the laugh.
tommie’s last blog post..Rascal Flatts – Stand
Oh now that’s just all SORTS of funny!
MamaGeek’s last blog post..Haiku – Craptacular Closets
Something similar happened with my stepson a few years ago.
I got onto our computer after him and started to type in Bank of A. And among the choices that popped up the the address bar was something that started with big t-ts.
I did a history and — well, let’s just say I was further educated.
Arkie Mama’s last blog post..My grandmother’s secret
That was funny 😉
Wacky Mommy’s last blog post..De-Lurk Already, Wouldja?
thanks for the laugh!
Kara’s last blog post..A trip to the dentist.
Perhaps he was doing a report on the bluefooted boobie, and thought he could find the information shorthand?
Yeah, I didn’t think so.
Avery’s last blog post..Keepin’ Tabs on the Grays
That’s pretty funny. That’s probably not a very good way to find what he was looking for. Still amusing though. I may have to do some..err, research.