Rules to being a successful mommy blogger – according to @kaisermommy
- Realize some women are BITCHEZ. They just are. Their moms and sisters are probably BITCHEZ too. Also? Their friends. Like speaks to like and BITCHEZ hang tight. Think of these BITCHEZ like a rank, wet fart. Unavoidable and best to avoid being in their path.
- Grooming counts dude. If I look at my 5 fave mommy bloggers – not a one of them presents as an uggo. I’m not talking imitating plastic surgery Barbie and spending hours in front of a mirror. Soap and water go a long way. Especially when choosing profile pictures. Sloth is one of the 7 deadlies peeps.
- Have some dayum FUN! Srsly people. Chances are, this is not the job that is providing the finances for your food and shelter. So CHILLAX with the awards, memes, retweets, commenting, replying to comments and for the love of Pete – “mark all as read” is your FRIEND.
- Ask questions. Want to know how to get some nifty widget in your sidebar? Make a button? Change a template? Figure advertising? Get threaded comments? ASK. Even the fucking BITCHEZ tend to answer questions when asked. People like to feel like experts. I’m horrid at reading blogs, replying to comments and all that – but when someone emails me and asks a question – I *tend* to sit down right then and answer it. (Not that I’m hot shit. Trust me.)
Run the other way from DRAMA! I’ll give someone a pass the first time they lose their shit on Twitter. Twice – ehhhh – anything after that and we’re back to the rank fart theory.
No mall hair. Now really this is a rule for life and not just mommy blogging. This was okay on a hot teenager in the 80s ….
(click photo for source)
. . .but NO MORE MALL BANGS. It’s been 20 years – no more curling bangs backward onto your head.
No one puts Baby in a corner. You have all this pain and all these feelings, and nobody’s really paying attention. Every single person . . . is ignoring your pain because they’re too busy with their own. The beautiful ones, the popular ones, the guys that pick on you. Everyone. Okay. That’s totally a quote from Buffy the Vampire Slayer where Buffy is talking to Jonathan in the clock tower. Still works though. Get yourself out of the corner. Goes back to having fun.
To sum up. Have fun in spite of the BITCHEZ in the DRAMA, remember to Shower your non 80s hair, while asking questions, and hiding in the corner is NOT FUN.
ps
HAVE FUN!
