I have had times in my life where I have felt a perfect peace.
And shortly after I have had my world fall apart.
I’ve always been a little bitter about that – Like oh thanks world, let me be happy and then fuck me over.
So when I found myself on the other side, I was naturally suspicious.
I enjoyed the feeling of being stable and centered.
And the next day I found challenges. In the form of Scout being a bit of a shmo. And learning a week after the fact that my dear 16 had knee surgery and feeling out of the loop.
This time, I knew I could get back to center. To stable. I knew the way, I knew the directions. I knew it was possible.
So I did the work. I gave myself space. I prayed. I thought. I questioned. I forgave (okay, I started forgiving – effort counts).
I found center again.
Today is still rougher than that perfect moment of knowing I was okay, but I know I am still on the other side of the pain and I know I can get back to that perfect moment.
I know how.