Kaiser Mommy

Choose Joy. Every Time.

Why Ivy is my hero.

Me: “I’m afraid my kid is going to come out as a combination of the Arby’s menu, chocolate pudding and frozen peaches.” Ivy: “Well at least you know he’ll be something you love!”

4 days

“You’re here?” “You’re here!” “I wondered if you’d be here today.” “What are you doing here?” “WHEN are you due?” All comments heard all freaking day from anyone who I remotely regularly talk to at work. Along with the follow up question: “Do you think you’ll go early?” (because clearly I’m fucking omnipotent and have compwete and tow-tal contwol over dis pwegnancy) Advice from Heidi at work (unfortunately she gave.. Read More

Something that helps

I don’t brag on my husband very often, but after having a rather rough day, and him engineering a way to get the mobile attached to the bed, I have to say, slow dancing to the Pottery Barn Kids mobile rendition of “Walk with the animals” with him did make me feel more like facing this parenthood thing.

5 days ish

Easter. Still not loving Easter. Today was meltdown day again. Scared. Scared of change, scared of what could go wrong, really not happy that after 10 months of sheer bliss I’m rewarded with some hella pain to make the 10 months of sheer bliss end. I mean, really, wouldn’t a tantric orgasm covered in chocolate really be better payback. And I mean an orgasm like a guy has one –.. Read More

Fysfunctional Damilies

I always knew where I fit with my mom’s pack of family. To screw me up, all you had to do was throw me to a weekend at my dad’s during the teen years and I knew I was the octagonal peg and I had no clue what shape the hole was I was supposed to fit. Fast forward a decade or so and I learned that all four of.. Read More

In Awe

I just slept 9 1/2 hours, and woke up without being in serious pain, and when I got up was able to walk with a little stiffness but not at all like a 90 year old woman with arthritis. I’ll concede that it is just possible that the chiropractor did some good yesterday. And that my bladder did not wake me up. And that the cat did not wake us.. Read More

My job sucks

I’m processing. I’m being really really honest here. We aren’t Pollyanna’s here – we don’t do trite, this is probably as far from idealistic as I will ever admit to being. I have one of the worst jobs on the planet to have while pregnant. Early on, there were just a couple of people at work who seemed to understand that. Most people when they hear I’m a special ed.. Read More

Good Words

So I’m not going to be raising a girl – but I came across this and thought it was well done – and thought I’d share it with y’allhttp://melinor.blogspot.com/2007/03/dispirited-thoughts-after-hard-day.html


Okay, I just watched the movie “Saved!” on (save me) the Oxygen channel. I actually really liked it – other than the fact that Jena Malone was walking around 39 weeks pregnant in a prom dress and not bitching non stop : ) But I thought they did a pretty decent job at it. Even the Mandy Moore character who strikes a certain resemblance to ……. managed to put herself.. Read More

9 days and working on being homeless

So we’ve had two showings of the house on Monday, we got a call this morning that the very first people who looked at the house want to come back and look tonight. Scary. Good Scary, but Scary.

Indignity of the day

While I did get to avoid being “checked” (or as Becky says “I sure don’t miss those frequent checkups where they dig into you like they are looking for their car keys.”) when I had to leave the “sample” I did pee all over my hand. Sigh.

34 years old

My husband is 34 years old (I think….) His mother just put HIS baby clothes in the mail for us to use.

10 days ish

Okay, so there are a few perks to being pregnant. 1. You can eat as much as you want and really never feel guilty2. Watching the baby move in your stomach – I could do this for hours, like a cat watching a fishbowl3. Getting a laugh out of the midwife who said she didn’t need to “check” you at your visit – her comment “if I can’t see the.. Read More