Kaiser Mommy

Choose Joy. Every Time.

Happy New Year Vision Boards

Vision boards seem to be all the rage. They fit nicely into “The Secret” step of “visualize to materialize”. Knowing that this year is going to bring all kinds of changes, I went ahead and made my own. Of course they aren’t as perfect as I would like, but that’s another challenge for the year – DOING something, even if it won’t be perfect on the first try. This was.. Read More

Seeing the Joy

Last night I spent too much time on Pinterest, I spent too much time looking at pictures of perfection and the comparison between the perfection and my abs, my makeup, my hideously messy house, my stacks of clean laundry – Well – I got a little tight in the chest and clutchy in my breath. I’ve been trying to figure out the now and the next. I’ve been trying to.. Read More

Right Next

I wrote about feeling like I needed to be spurred into action. As Jene’ said – to know a truth intellectually, yet be unable to act on it. I wrote it expecting responses that would move me forward. Instead, your voices told me to stay the heck still and be gentle with myself. I found myself extremely grateful I took the time to write and share, because each of you.. Read More

Right Now

Do you ever wonder how many times you will have to be hit over the head with a lesson before you choose to learn it? This is where I am right now. Back in April, my friend Carrie sent me to a site with guided meditations, specifically because there was one about opening my heart to love that she thought would help me. Night after night I would pick one.. Read More

How to protect yourself

Out of all the information about gun control, second amendment rights, comfort level with different weapons … the thing I took away as the most useful tidbit was “carry a flashlight”. I used to have one, but I don’t know where it is (Sorry Scout). After reading about non lethal self defense methods – I decided flashlight was a good first line of defense. (Click the link, it will give.. Read More

Still throwin’ down over panties.

I’m still throwing down with you about getting the ugly out of your life. Knickers and all. That underwear drawer was a starting point for me. I keep thinking of you while I wander stores. I know Amanda got rid of the ugly and found that a week without kids is a good reason to get back to, ahem, basics, with her husband. You can get new, black, non ugly.. Read More

A challenge: NO! More! Ugly! Knickers!

I am throwing down with you RIGHT! NOW! Thanks to my darling new NuvaRing, I am on day FIFTEEN of my super special girly time. Yay laser ring! I have seen my entire rotation of monthly underwear. Not, of course, the kinky fuckery, lacy pretty stuff for show and moan, but the … other stuff. I’m here to tell ya. Screw all of that. I’m putting my foot down ….. Read More

Making the Best . . . Well . . . trying to . . .

I need ET to walk up to my heart with his glowy finger and say “OUCH“. Cause that’s where I’m at, folks. Tight throat, tears seeping out. Fuck I hurt. Yesterday as I was taking a nap – because growth causes the need for sleep . . . and ice cream . . . I was trying to decide what I could actively do differently when the going gets shitty… Read More


Last night, I was trying to fall asleep. Instead I was rehashing shit my dad’s girlfriend pulled before and after he died. Charming things such as trolling my blog, my friends’ blogs, telling my grandma his soul couldn’t rest because of how I was handling his estate, keeping all the money for herself (against his written wishes), not paying for the funeral, the strings of emails to my brothers and.. Read More

The one where I talk honestly about thinking about having another child.

It used to be simple. Scout and I had Alex. I was exhausted, never wanted to go through pregnant and newborn again. He only ever wanted one child. He got his boy on the first shot. Done. Then my dad died, I was destroyed, and the only thing that that let me survive that was my brothers. Granted, non-legal step-brothers if one wanted to be technical. Still. These men are.. Read More

Where I talk about getting things together

I am totally stalling cleaning my living room by writing this post. You know how it is. I’ve spent the month of June collecting myself. There’s the time spent with “Mine” (who still has no blog name). Alex is back for camp and swimming lessons. My goal for the month of June is to get my house together. Plan for July is get my office and businessy stuff together (the.. Read More

of epic hickeys and swim trunks

After the debacle of the boys and calling off men for the summer of 2012 and planning for all my romance to be of my own design with my girls … After deciding I loved my little house and my little life – I sat at my friend Amanda’s and I met a boy. Nice enough boy. A month later I decided to make a play for the boy. As.. Read More